Wellness Wednesdays #7: Changing Perspective
Today is the seventh installment of a weekly series where I will ask a question related to the themes on my blog (mental health, self-care, community, poetry, etc.). I am trying to get people talking, build a sense of community and increase awareness about mental health. I want to see what’s going on in people’s heads, hear their stories, and gain some perspective and solutions. This week’s question is:
What is something about yourself that you once looked at as a flaw/weakness that you now recognize as a strength? Why? What changed your perspective?
I didn’t have any responses from my WW squad from weeks ago, so I will field this one myself. To make me feel better I really need your help in the blog and facebook comments. You DO want to make me feel better, don’t ya? Don’t ya? Thought so. *flips non-existent hair*
I must start off by saying, I have always been hyper critical of myself. I compare myself to such strange, impossibly high standards to the point it actually causes me to give up. I figure why put the effort if I’m not gonna meet them anyway. You know, because that is super conducive to success. Where is my sarcasm font? One result of that behavior has been me identifying everything about me as a fault. I always figured that any attribute of mine had to be faulty somehow. The mind is so tricky in that way.
Lately I have begun the exercise of identifying these perceived faults and finding the good in them. Not talking about the tragic flaws and bad behavior, just flipping some perspective. I am pretty good at flipping tables in the spirit of “What You Not Gon’ Do,” so why not use my flipping powers for good. I once looked at my dramatic, theatrical nature, and extreme goofiness as a bad thing. I would not speak up in fear of being looked at in a certain light. For sure I wouldn’t talk to certain people because I was terrified that I would be looked at like some sort of buffoon. It held back my writing and social life because of this looming anxiety of embarrassment.
BUT-UH-RUH, NOW… my fucks about how I am being perceived have stormed out the door in the most dramatic exit that could be mustered. They left in a huff! (I’ll tell y’all me and Belinda’s inside joke about this one day) I am my superfluous, copious, extra self all over the place. (Kinda like that sentence.) Embracing that personality trait has started to open some pretty amazing doors. It has ushered people into my world that I would have never connected with had I continued to hold back all this wonderful melodramatic energy. Not only did that energy pull them in, but it is something they appreciate and admire. Well, I’ll be! Being myself… who knew? *shrug*